Working in the health/wellness field and industry can be a very frustrating experience if you love people dearly. Or are a people pleaser.
I happen to fall in both categories.
This past weekend, as I was on a long ride and long run, the realization once again hit me that I can only help the people that want to be helped. Just like in a relationship, it takes two people invested to make it work. I can only educate, write and speak so much. People have to realize this knowledge for themselves.
It was time for a breakup.
A breakup with trying to win everybody and make them see the truth. A breakup with people pleasing. A breakup with driving myself crazy with people who refuse to “get it.” A breakup with arguing and debates that go nowhere (except for unkind words).
The breakup has been hard. It breaks my heart that people have to wait for a crisis or serious illness (that was easily preventable all along) or friend or loved one to die. I’m heartbroken that people have to become really, really, really sick, continue to live life with chronic illness, get diagnosed with a life-threatening disease or worse - make their children suffer the consequences of their poor choices and excuses.
Others fall in to the category of always trying to prove people wrong. They only want to pick fights, cause online wars (bullying), start unproductive “discussions” and use other passive aggressive behaviors. They don’t want to be helped. I cannot change them. No one can. I can only hope and pray that they will come to know that I have their best interest in for their life, health and happiness.
Breakups are never easy. Usually one party is left crying and the other “moving on.” For most people, breaking up is an emotional time. Whether it was the person who initiated it or not, our hearts feel like they are torn in two. We loved them dearly. I genuinely love people. I long for them to know the freedom they can have with their health, happiness, life. Every morning, I start the day with a prayer that I will be able to spread the wellness message effectively and hearts will be open to receiving it.
However, the plague of people-pleasing caught up with me and it was time for a breakup. Rest assured, me (and my team) will continue to spread the message of good health and wellness but no longer will I be trying to please people that don’t want to be helped. I will continue to live the healthy example just like I have my entire life.
Those that seek to listen will ask. Those that listen, will learn. And those that listen and learn, will live.
Your turn: what have you had to break up with recently?
Cover photo credit: Capture of Dreams