It's only the first week February and I don't know if people are SUDDENLY reminded that spring break is almost here OR they had an epiphany that they should drop some weight. Perish the thought of actually living and breathing and sweating on a daily basis. That would be way too easy. Yes, because we want things BAM. Instantly. If you can't get it at the drive thru or a four hour body (yes I went there) or in 29.3 seconds flat then it isn't worth it.

The issue with a cleanse is that a cleanse diet is only short term. It doesn't give your body the nutrients and minerals it needs. And energy (calories) to go about your day.

So if you want to try a juice cleanse or a whatever other cleanse that catches your fancy, stop right here. Yes, you might lose a few pounds (because you shocked your system, d'uh) but you'll gain them all back again. WHY DON'T PEOPLE UNDERSTAND this? Maybe it's the word "understand" that people don't get.

So here is the Rocket Science Cleanse that you've been seeking all your life. Happy Valentine's Day :) Yes, I like to spread love to everyone.

#1) Drink water every day, all day for the rest of your life. Stay away from soda, coffee, iced tea, juice (most are just filled with sugar & not really juice), wine/beer/liquor and any other beverage in a cup, bottle or jug.

#2) Eat fresh fruit in season. Buy from your local CSA or farmers market.

#3) Eat fresh veggies in season. Buy from your local CSA or farmers market.

#4) Limit grains, dairy and meat. If you consume them, make sure they are whole grains, grass fed and organic.

#5) Get sweaty daily. Jump rope, run, walk, hike, snowshoe, shovel snow, wash windows, dance naked (kidding), ride a bike ( #cyclenerds rule!), yoga- just do SOMETHING! Sweat that junk out!

#6) No processed food or sugar. If it comes in a package, put it back. If it has the word "corn syrup" or the "high fructose corn syrup" run fast and far.

#7) Life cleanse. Be swift to love, slow to get angry, quick to help others, flee from temptation, avoid judgement, be happy and always be kind to all.

Repeat steps 1-7 daily. Never stop!

There it is. The ultimate cleanse. Try it and tell me how you feel!

Photo by: andi.vs.zf